Non veg jokes -12

Just too funny

Types of Orgasms
---
1. The Optimist:
Oh Yes, Oh Yes, Oh Yes... !!

2. The Pessimist:
Oh No, Oh No, Oh No.... !!!

3. The Confused:
Oh Yes, Oh No, Oh Yes, Oh No...... !!!

4. The Traveller:
Ahh, I'm coming, I'm coming...... !!!

5. The Religious:
Oh God, Oh God...... !!!

6. The Greedy :
Ahh, More, More, More..... !!

7. The Murderer:
Ahh, If you take it out..., I'll kill you...... !!!

8. The Submariner scuba:
Mmm...Ohhh...Deeper...Deeper... Go Deeper...... !!!

9. Classical Indian orgasm:
Nahi... Nahiiii.. Naahiiiiinnnnn...... !!!

10. Rock 'n' Roll Orgasm: Oh baby oh yeah, oh baby...... !!!

11. Heavy Metal Orgasm:
Yaa Come on Honey.... Do me hard... Yeahh Baby !!..... come on...... !!!

12. Marathi Orgasm:
Aai Ga... aayi aaayi... Aaayiii gaa...... !!!

13. Parsi Orgasm:
Oh mummy mummy mummyyy...... !!!

14. Gujju Orgasm:
Oh Bhagwan... mari gai... mari gai... aaahh...... !!!

15. South Indian Orgasm:
Aaiiyo... Aaiiyo... Aaiyayyooo...... !!!

16. Bong Orgasm:
Oodi baba! Ooooddddiiiiiii baaaa baaaba...... !!!

17. Rajasthani Orgasm:
O Thaari...... !!!

18. Punjabi Orgasm:
Chal utar ja kaminey...., mainu aur vi kaam HAIN !

19. Pakistani Orgasm :
Bhaijaaaaan..... !
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उसकी तस्वीर मेरी आँखों में बसी है,
पर वो मादरचोद किसी और से फंसी हैं,,,,

देखना एक दिन उसकी कबर खोदुंगा,
और उसकी कबर पर उसकी सहेली को चोदुंगा ।😜😜😆😆😂😂
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😡😡भड़का हुआ आशिक😡😡

BRA' ki mehak churai nahi jati '' PANTY '' ki jhalak chupai nahi jati kitni bhi choti ho GF ki mosambi 1 bar chuus lo to bhulai nahi jati ..
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Pee Raha Hu Brandy..

Chaahiye 1 Randi,

Magar Kya Karu
Maarket Me He Itni Mandee..

Ki Haath Se Hilaani Padti He Apni Dandi..

Happy thandi..
Without Randi...

.
Girlfriend: ''Can You Tell Me??
What is My Bra Size??''
.
Boyfriend: ''36.....''
.
Girlfriend: ''WOW!!! How do you know???
.
Boyfriend: ''Yesterday I Opened it.''
.
Girlfriend: ''But in my Bra, there is no Number?''
.
Boyfriend: ''So what Babe..... I am an Engineer, from Load I can Calculate Area...''
.
Engineer's ki jai ho!!!! 

.

Ladkiya 4 Cheezo ki diwani hoti hai 1) Make up 2) Mobile 3) Shopping
4)
Niche dekh
.
.
.

.
.
.
abey ghochu apne niche dekh 

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Ek Sadhu se ek bhakt ne Pucha-

Aap Hamesha Zameen Pe Kyu Bethtey Ho ?
.
.
Sadhu Ne Bahut Khubsurat Jawab Diya-
.
.
.
.
.
.
"Tujhe Koi Taqleef Hai madarchod ?

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Teacher: what is your best friends  name.
Student: Madanlal Darshanlal Chodhary.
teacher: its very long, any short name. . .
Student: Ma. . Dar. . .Chod.
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GHATAK MESSAGE:-

Ek ladki apne boyfriend se: Kabhi tumne BOOBS se dudh piya hai???

Ladka (sharmate hue): Nahi...

.
.
.

  Ladki:
To bachpan me kya BAAP KA LUND
chus ke bada hua hai
bhenchod.?! 
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Ek Kisaan 1 murga leke aaya. Us murge ne aate hi 150 murgiyo koj chod diya.

Ye dekh kar kishan bahut khush hua. Sham tak us murge ne sari batakho (duck)or Baki janwaro ko b chod diya,

ye dekhkar kishan kuch pareshan hua. Agle din jab subah hui to murga khet me mara pda tha

or upar giddh mandra rhe the. Use dekhkar Kishan bola, "mar gaya bhosdi k,

harkate b to teri aisi thi" tabhi murge ne ek aankh kholi or bola "chup madarchod ,
Acting kar raha hu bhenchod,
inme se ek ko niche to aane de ,
Fir dekh kaisi gaand marta hu inki" )

Has kya rahe ho ,saalo
Murga bilkul tum par gaya hai
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Its not that "Sabbra Ka Fal Meetha Hota Hai"

But Its real meaning is that
"Sab" "Bra" "Ka" ''Fal'' meetha hota hai.            🍒
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

Baba bhosdiwale Kahte hai ki-

"Machhi aur ladki khud pakad k khao toh hi asli maza hai,

Lund aur kanoon kabhi haath me na lo,

Naukri aur Goti pe kabhi laat na maaro,

Lohe par hathoda aur chut par lauda tabhi maaro jab woh garam ho,

Kismat ki karni, chut ki garmi aur lund ki besharmi nahi rukti,

Aur sambhaal ke sex karo Qki,
bandook se nikla foulad aur chut se nikli aulad kabhi wapis nahi jaati."

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Ekdum kadak!! -

Girl:- mei hu ladki jheel ki,
chut meri steel ki,
chod sake na hathi ghode,
tu kya chodega maa ke loude...

Boy:-naam hai mera pappan pillo,
lund ka weight chappan kilo,
jamin par maru toh kuva khod jaye...
tu to kya teri ma bhi chud jaye..

Has mat forward kar market me naya hai....😛

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  At sex toy shop...
Girl: Duplicate lund ka section kaha hai?
CLERK: waha par hai Mam
Girl : wo red. wala kitne ka hai?
CLERK::O hawas ki rand! wo aag bujane ka cylinder hai.

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How do Cricket commentators describe a NAKED GIRL?
No cover, No extra cover, 2 silly points, 2 fine legs, 1 deep gully & no grass on the pitch but moisture under the surface!! The pitch is ideal for stroke play.
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While examining a young female patient, doctor tells her:
"Ur heart, lungs, pulse, BP r fine. Now let me see that cute little thing which gets you ladies into all kinds of trouble."
Woman immediately took off her jeans..
Doc shocked said:
"No No. Please put on your clothes.
Just show me your tongue."

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